21 April 2007

I thank you for the music

I lost my father in 1986, when I was in my final year of university in Melbourne, Australia. The timing was such that I did not even get to return to Malaysia to attend his funeral. Thus it can be said that I have never managed to see him for the last time.

The last time I ever saw him alive was sometime in February 1984, when I returned for the summer holidays, and I cannot even remember that moment today.

Twenty one years later I begin to realise that I am beginning to miss him, and also realise that I am beginning to resemble him in terms of temperament and character, some of which are things I'd like to change.

So Dad, if you are up there looking down on me, thanks for guiding me through the fire and ice since 12-08-1986 until now, and future. I may not have turned out to be the person you wanted me to be, but I did try.


An only child, alone and wild
A cabinet maker's son
His hands were meant for different work
And his heart was known to none
He left his home and went his lone and solitary way
And he gave to me a gift I know I never can repay

A quiet man of music, denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldn't wait
He earned his love through discipline
A thundering velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band

My brothers lives were different
For they heard another call
One went to Chicago, and the other to St. Paul
And I'm in Colorado
When I'm not in some hotel
Living out this life I've chose
And come to know so well

I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go
I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And papa I don't think I said
I love you near enough

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band

-- Dan Fogelberg

1 comment:

Gallivanter said...

I know exactly how you feel. I lost my dad in 1986 too, 2nd October.